“You really should use fresh, but if all you have is frozen peas, that’s okay too.” The short woman on the cooking channel is splitting fresh pea pods. The peas tumble onto white linen. She looks like your second-grade teacher, which is probably why you enjoy watching her, listening to the gentle timbre of her voice.

You have frozen peas. Even though this is the bag that you reserve to put between the back of your neck and the couch cushion to relieve headaches, you are willing to sacrifice it. 

You don’t have prosciutto, but you do have soy bacon.

You don’t have butter, but you have margarine.

You don’t have cream, but you have milk.

You don’t have lemons, but you have lemonade.

You’ve found pasta under the sink.

The news says there’s a serial rapist on the loose. He’s suspected to still be within the county lines. But now you’re learning to make pasta with prosciutto and peas. Something you can act on. 

The host, like all cooking show hosts, has perfectly manicured hands. As you pour the cooked pasta into the colander, you notice your own unpolished nails. You’ve often wondered how women with manicured nails find the time and money for this upkeep. Are they constantly noticing the nails of the unmanicured? Do your cuticles disgust them?

You eat the pasta directly out of the pan. The heat from the metal thickens the sauce as you eat it. By the time you reach the last few bites, the texture resembles what it looked like on TV.

Shannon McLeod
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